Sticky Situations-M-Humour (I hope...) – By kiki Posted 21/09/2007 08:54:02 PM

Yeah...I know...haven't updated this in quite some time. This isn't actually anything new, it's just what is on ff and what should have been put here, oh, years ago.

Don't really like this one but...em..Enjoy!
****************

“Come on, Bones. It’ll be fun.”

Taking a firm grip of Brennan’s upper arm, Booth guided her through a set of glass double doors. This wasn’t easy as she kept wriggling and whinging the whole time. Not that the whinging made it difficult to move her…it was just so darned annoying to listen to.

“You agreed to come.”

“I didn’t agree to come quietly.”

As soon as they were through the entrance, Brennan planted her feet solidly on the ground and refused to be propelled forwards any further. Booth let out an impatient sigh and shoved his shoulder into her back, desperate to get her moving. He managed to get her to take a step or two forward, but that’s as good as it got. Poor Booth was nearly horizontal, so great were his efforts. He could feel himself getting weaker and his shoulder was slipping further and further down her back.

Eventually, it grazed off her behind. Brennan suddenly let out a frightened yelp and shot forward about ten feet. Booth’s delight was quickly dissipated when his body realised his support had vanished and he rapidly toppled to the floor.

This seemed to please Brennan. When he righted himself and began brushing off his clothes, she appeared more cheerful than she’d been during the whole car journey over. She offered him a smile, complete with dimples, and even attempted to join him in the dusting of his clothes. She gave his trouser leg a final brush before looking up at him, eyes dancing, and commented, “Can’t take you anywhere.”

Slightly worried that his partner seemed happiest when he was in pain and had just been mortified, Booth gruffly muttered a thanks and moved towards the desk in the middle of the large room.

He gave the brunette girl sitting behind the desk his best charm smile, complete with his name. The girl literally swooned. Booth realised, with no small amount of astonishment, that Brennan was physically bristling behind him.

She used an unnecessary amount of elbows, even though they were the only two people in the wide entrance waiting to talk to the girl, to push her way beside him, only stopping when her arms imitated his and rested on the desk.

“And I’m Dr. Temperance Brennan. His partner.”

Booth gave her a quick sidelong glance. That was the first time he had ever heard Brennan refer to their relationship with a specific and noticeable emphasis on the word ‘partner’. If he didn’t know any better, he would have thought she was trying to imply that their bond was something other than work related.

“Yes, em, she’s my partner and I want her to be my guest today. I’ve got one of the things here somewhere…”

Booth began a quick root in his bag and eventually pulled out a somewhat crumpled white laminated sheet of paper entitled ‘guest pass’ with his name in bold along the bottom. As he handed it over to the girl he realised that she and Brennan had been engaging in a furious staring match while he had been searching.

With a sniff the girl inspected the pass and typed the relevant details into the computer. She made something of a production of asking Brennan to spell her first name, the implication being that it was rather strange. When Brennan saw that the girl had neglected to put ‘Dr.’ before her name, she nearly hit the roof. Booth had to drag her from the room, arms tight around her waist, simultaneously apologising and thanking the bemused girl.

Booth eventually managed to get himself and his partner through the doors at the end of the room. Pleased with his achievements, his pride was short-lived as he had to spend a further three minutes holding Brennan in place as she kept trying to wrestle her way back to the girl to give her a piece of her mind. Booth’s strong arms were too powerful, however, and eventually she slumped back against his chest. She tilted her head upwards to look at him.

“Well, you’ve finally managed to get me here. What do we do now?”

With a smile, he made a sweeping gesture with his hands across the vast room they were currently standing in. Treadmills, running machines, weights, cycling machines, rowing machines and brightly coloured mats stretched as far as the eye could see. There was also a sign pointing to a swimming pool in the next room. He had attempted to persuade her to make use of the pool and was lucky to have escaped with his life after the little suggestion. Her compromise was to join him at the gym, once, no swimming included.

“Anything you want, Bones.”

She grumbled and stepped away from him.

“I don’t understand why you have to spend a ridiculous amount of money for membership to simulate exercise that can be done for free normally.”

Booth sighed. She’d agreed to come. She hadn’t agreed not to complain. He mused privately that he really wouldn’t have it any other way. Her blunt manner of addressing things was just one of the many things he loved about her. As a friend. Obviously.

“Well, if you want to drop your bag into the dressing room…the women’s dressing room and I’ll drop mine into the men’s, I’ll see you back here in a minute.”

She nodded once at him and moved away to follow his instructions, ponytail bouncing merrily in time with her steps. Booth took a moment to appreciate her curves in the tracksuit bottoms and tank top she was currently sporting, which were perhaps slightly more figure hugging than her normal clothes. With a quick shake of his head, he went to deposit his own bag. After a few seconds he realised he was following his partner. With another shake of the head, accompanied by a little sigh, he turned in the opposite direction towards the men’s dressing rooms. Damn her figure. Her steps were hypnotic.

Soon after this Booth and Brennan were reunited in the middle of the floor once more. They moved to the side of the room and completed a number of warm-up exercises. After a quick discussion, some might even call it a heated argument, they decided to use the treadmills first. They chose two machines positioned beside one another. Booth attempted to lean over and show his partner how to program the machine and set the appropriate speed but she slapped him away and insisted that she could do it alone. He muttered something unintelligible and started his own.

Apparently Brennan had no clue what she was doing as when she first stepped on the machine she was almost propelled off the back of it. With an amused guffaw, Booth politely inquired how the ‘doing it alone’ idea was progressing. She gave him a nasty glare for his troubles and grumbled something about it being planned. With a twitching mouth, Booth returned to his own workout, but kept a cautious eye on his partner as she adjusted the machine’s settings. When she stepped onto it the next time, it was without any major incident.

She gave him a triumphant smirk before reaching forward and increasing the speed. Booth moved his head sideways and had a quick peek at the lime green number displayed on the screen, indicating the current speed. With a flip of his stomach he realised that she was already moving at a faster pace than him. He quickly adjusted his machine accordingly and then, after a further moments thought, pressed the increase speed button a further three times.

He could see a frown appearing on Brennan’s face.

“Treadmills aren’t very good training for actual long distance running, you know, Booth. The terrain outside is naturally littered with obstacles and undulations in slope. It’s far easier to run on a treadmill.”

A second or two later, Booth gasped his agreement. He stifled a groan as he saw Brennan push buttons a number of times and watched as her legs began to beat the moving surface faster and harder. Cursing his partner’s fitness, he duly followed suit.

A number of minutes passed before Brennan offered, “This is brilliant. Can’t you feel it tightening your tibialis anterior and hamstrings? Being, obviously, the biceps femoris, semimembranosus, and semitendinosus.”

Under normal circumstances Booth might have been able to humour her anatomical references. Lack of oxygen to the brain tends to make an agent crabby, however, and he snarled, “No, Bones, I can’t. I can’t actually feel anything in my legs but burning fire. Can’t tell one muscle-somethingorotherus from another. Can we stop?”

Glancing at him in surprise, Brennan nodded and began to slow the machine down. Booth forced himself to wait a couple of seconds before he followed suit.

“You ok, Booth?”

“Me? Yeah, I’m fine. It’s just, you…you’re not really used to these things. Wouldn’t want to overexert you on your first go.”

With that, he and his purple face stumbled, wobbly-legged, off the machine.

“Mmmhmm,” Brennan raised an eyebrow as she joined him on the carpet once more.

Booth placed his hands on his knees and wheezed for about fifteen seconds, all the while repeatedly asking his partner is she was ok, if that had been too much for her.

Brennan began to get antsy and looked around the room in search of the next machine she wanted to use.

“How about doing some weights? That would give your…ah…our legs a rest. What do think?”

Booth could have told her he thought she was some kind of evil demon robot sent to torment him but he knew that, with Brennan anyway, he’d need a little concrete evidence before he could throw accusations like that about. She often had a hard time distinguishing the times when people, particularly him, were being serious and the times things were being said purely in jest.

He felt he was being extremely fair when he simply nodded in agreement before slouching off after her. Poor legs would probably never be the same.

Brennan had settled herself on a decline bench and was casting wary glances at the rows of dumbbells around her. Booth came to a stop beside her, one hand pressed against his side, trying to ease the discomfort of a cramp that had developed. She caught sight of his hand’s position and gestured towards it inquiringly. When he explained, she began to launch into a very long and complicated reason for this, due to tissue respiration and lactic acid. He shut her up by plonking a dumbbell into her outstretched, gesturing right hand.

She gripped the weight firmly in her hand, giving him a very satisfied look that she hadn’t managed to drop it. Unfortunately, all she seemed to be able to do was look. She had no real idea of what to do with it.

Chuckling gently to himself, Booth motioned for her to shimmy forward and he settled himself down behind her, both with a leg on either side of the bench. Hesitating for a moment, he plucked up the courage to move closer so that his chest was pressed against her back. He felt as well her saw an involuntary tremor ripple through her as he tried to focus on the task at hand and not Brennan’s glossy hair or alluring scent.

He managed to fit two dumbbells into overhand grips, one on the left and one on the right. “Now,” he breathed into her ear, “give me your hands.” She didn’t need to be told twice. He placed her arms down the length of her knees. He could feel goosebumps running down her skin, but her back leaning firmly against him made it quite obvious that she was actually rather warm.

“Right, now this exercise would involve you lying back on the bench while moving the weights so that they’re at the side of the torso, at chest level. They’re then raised to straight-arm’s length, no bending of the elbows at all. This means that the weights should be directly over the chest in contact with each other. The arms are then slowly bent and the dumbbells lowered until they are on either side of the chest. They’re lowered until the most maximum comfortable stretch is reached. Then the weights are raised once more and the whole thing is repeated.”

Throughout his whole description, Booth had moved Brennan’s arms in the appropriate directions. His large hands completely encircled her little wrists. At the start of his instructions, Brennan had attempted to lie back against him, but had quickly realised that he hadn’t meant for her to literally follow that particular demand. This little revelation had been accompanied by a sharp intake of breath from the two at the feel of her pushing back firmly against him. The partners had quickly ignored this and had completed the remainder of the pseudo demonstration in silence, both unaware that their flustered state of mind was betrayed to the other by the rapid pulse thumping through both of them.

Booth had ensured that the weights were safe and out of harm’s way before he settled his hands down onto his knees. Neither partner seemed aware that they were now sitting tightly against one another for no apparent reason. Eventually, Booth moved his hands so that they briefly gripped the area around Brennan’s shoulders. He heard her quietly gasp at the touch. Figuring he’d never really have a chance like this again, he slid his hands slowly down the length of her back and circled them around to rest briefly on her lower chest.

A second or two drifted past before he confirmed, “That exercise works those areas of the body.”

It seemed to take Brennan a minute before she was able to reply, “I’m assuming you mean the anterior deltoids and the pectoralis major.” When she named the second set of muscles, she rested her hands briefly on top of his, where they still pressed against her chest.

“Right.”

About ten seconds later, the partners jumped up almost simultaneously. Both had grown uncomfortable with the prolonged contact and were unsure what to do about it. With a lot of throat clearing, Booth suggested that they do some exercises on the mats before calling it a day. Brennan offered no argument. Neither seemed willing to address the fact, either aloud or to themselves, that Brennan hadn’t actually lifted any weights by herself nor had the two done very much exercise.

The partners flopped down on adjacent mats. Brennan began doing what looked like some kind of yoga movements. Booth began gently teasing her and then eased himself into a few push-ups. Roughly fifteen minutes later the two were engaging in their final exercise, both doing sit-ups.

Amazed at the woman’s sheer persistence, Booth glanced over at his partner.

“So, Bones, how many are you on?”

Brennan let out a quick gasp of air before replying, “About a hundred.”

After a beat, she asked, “And you?”

“How many did you say you’d done again?”

“About a hundred.”

“Yeah. A hundred. Yeah, me too.”

Brennan cast a furtive glance at her partner. He caught her eye and flashed her his biggest and best charm smile. In spite of herself, she giggled. Booth suddenly leapt into a standing position and held out a hand to help her up. Surprisingly, she accepted.

“Well, Bones, that was fun, wouldn’t you say?”

“Yes, Booth. Very good indeed. I rather enjoyed working up a sweat with you.”

He wiggled his eyebrows at her. She laughed and skipped away from him towards the dressing room. A few seconds later Booth was on his way to collect his bag from the appropriate dressing room, having already tripped over a mat and walked into three people.

Damn those hips

Haha! I loved it! Kiki, you sneaky little witch, you never tell me when you post! And I'm starved for kiki stories! So please, please, don't let so much time go by before posting again!

wow an update.....I can't believe it

poor Booth and the people in his way.....but he can't walk straight when he is thinking about Brennan's hips all the time.....people have to understand that.....

I hope there will be another update here soon

I've read all of this... instead of writing a paper. But I enjoyed every moment.... Update any time soon?

Bahaha...can't believe people are still bothering to read this...lord...given that I'm such a terrible updater and all. My bad.

Anyhoo, here's the next "thrilling" installment. I've always loved Twister...

**********************

Brennan took a deep breath before hesitantly knocking on the door.

She was left shifting her weight nervously for a number of seconds before the door opened and Booth’s surprised, but smiling, face greeted her.

“Bones! Wasn’t expecting you. Come in.”

Brennan nodded slowly, possibly more to herself than to him. She crossed the threshold and Booth closed the door behind them.

He gestured towards the living room and Brennan followed him obediently.

“So, what’s up?”

She bit her lip nervously.

“I…I dunno…I was just a bit…ah…lonely at home and…and you always call in completely unannounced to me. This is no different!”

Booth smiled at her suddenly raised defences.

“I wasn’t giving out, Bones. I was just wondering to what do I owe the pleasure.”

Brennan coloured instantly.

“Oh. Sorry. I…should I have brought food or something? I don’t really know what I’m meant to do…”

Her eyes moved about the room, searching for anything to focus her thoughts. Her gaze fell on a rather plastic looking white sheet on the floor in the middle of the room, adorned with different coloured dots.

“What’s that?”

Booth ran a hand across the back of his head.

“Oh, that’s just Twister. Parker was over earlier and he really loves it so…”

He let out a short burst of laughter at Brennan’s lost expression.

“You’ve never played Twister?”

She crossed her arms protectively across her chest and said in a very small voice, “No.”

Booth began jumping around like a little kid.

“Well, come on! I’ll teach you.”

“Booth, I don’t know…”

“Please, Bones? PLEASE?”

He batted his eyes at her and pushed his lower lip upward. Brennan laughed and swatted his head.

“That’s a yes?”

“Fine. It’s a yes.”

Skipping madly, Booth practically pounced on top of the sheet. He held up a square of cardboard that Brennan hadn’t noticed before. It was divided into four sections, each section corresponding to specific hand or foot. There was a black pointer in the middle that could be rotated around the square.

“Ok, Bones, now what happens is, this little dial thing is spun around” he gave a quick demonstration, “and wherever it lands, that’s where you have to move whatever part of your body it’s referring to.”

Brennan nodded.

“First one to fall loses. Ok, let’s go.”

On her second go, Brennan fell over, squishing her face against the sheet. She angrily blew her bangs out of her face and glowered at Booth’s hysterical laughter.

“That was so…that was only your second go…you’d only moved a hand and a foot…hee HEE!”

Brennan punched him defensively.

“That was a practise go.”

He raised an eyebrow.

“Sure it was.”

They started again. Brennan got into the swing of it and things quickly turned competitive. The room was soon filled with shouts objecting to the other person’s most recent move.

“You can’t put your hand there!”

“Well your back is in my way!”

“That’s because you put your right hand on my blue.”

“It is not your blue! You cannot claim ownership of a blue. That was the only one I could reach, anyway.”

“Your foot is on the green I want.”

“Well, tough. Find another green.”

“I can’t…I’m not…the body’s not meant to bend this way.”

“You can’t move my hand!”

“You’re just trying to make things difficult.”

“I am not! That’s what the spinny thing says!”

“Hey! Hey! HEY! No touching! Particularly not there!”

“I wasn’t touching, I was falling.”

“Then you lose!”

“I didn’t actually fall. I was just starting to fall. Your…ah…well, you prevented me from doing so. Thank you.”

There was a rather undignified snort in response.

Brennan’s thigh started to vibrate.

“Ooh, Booth that’s my…my phone…I have to…”

Booth had shut his eyes tightly as soon as the ringing as begun.

“Yes, Bones, I can tell it’s your phone. It’s practically stuck to my ear. Oh my God. I’m going deaf. I’m actually going deaf.”

Ignoring him, Brennan dug her hand into her pocket. The awkward position of her body made the object exceedingly difficult to retrieve. She barely completed it without falling over and nearly throttled Booth in the process.

Finally, she tilted her head upwards, shook the hair out of her eyes and gasped, “Brennan.”

“Sweetie? Is everything alright?”

Brennan gave Booth’s hand a quick kick, as it was currently pushing against her foot in the quest to know who was on the phone. She counted to ten and exhaled slowly.

“Everything’s fine, Ange. I just…what’s up?”

Angela was cut off before she could even begin by Booth furiously bellowing, “You don’t kick people! That’s against the rules…my hand was…couldn’t move my hand…no kicking!”

“Booth’s there? Where are you?”

Brennan glared down at Booth, who glared right back, then spoke into the phone once more, “I’m at Booth’s. We’re just…eh…not to be rude or anything but why did you call?”

She could actually hear her friend smiling down the phone.

“Ok, I get it. I’m not wanted. Not that I blame you, of course. Mr. Hunky F.B.I man with his chiselled good looks, muscular figure…”

“Ange!”

“Sorry, Sweetie. But you know you can’t deny it. Listen, I got the number of that friend of mine.”

Brennan’s mind was blank.

“The dentist, Sweetie? The one you asked me to get for you coz you don’t trust your own dentist?”

Brennan gave her head a quick shake as she replied, “Oh, right. Sorry. Ok…em…”

She looked around and noticed a little coffee table situated beside the couch. On it there was a pen and some kind of sheet of paper. Booth could easily reach that.

“Ok, Ange, hang on…Booth? Could you do me a favour?”

The somewhat muffled and rather cranky voice of her partner loudly replied, “Well, Bones, seeing as I’m the one who’s currently got his head between your thighs, I’d say you’re doing me the favour.”

Brennan grimaced at the loud squeal that exploded into her ear.

She gave her partner’s hand another hearty kick, but he simply smiled wickedly up at her, a rather impressive feat given his current position, and mouthed “Payback”.

“Brennan!”

“Booth!”

Grinning happily, Booth decided to join in on the fun and added a joyful shout of “Bones!” to the proceedings.

After a further few seconds of frantic yelling, in which Booth’s head was jostled around an inordinate amount, Brennan finally let out a piercing whistle. Everyone immediately shut up, Angela doing so with an enormous volume of grumbling about how some people should warn some other people before they burst their fragile innocent eardrums.

“Everybody, time up!”

She felt a little pull as Booth began to tug on her trouser leg.

“It’s time-out, Bones. Time-out.”

Brennan’s face fell but she nevertheless valiantly continued, “Oh. Fine. Anyway, Angela, nothing’s going on…we’re just…it’s a game.”

Booth decided he should chime in and help with the explanation. “We’re playing a game, Angela. One you know well. Arms and legs everywhere.”

“Booth!”

“Sweetie!”

Brennan let out a strangled cry.

“No, look, Angela, nothing’s going on. We’re just playing a game. Twisting or something.”

Booth helpfully roared “Yeah, we’re twisting all over each other.”

“Booth! No, Angela, it’s nothing. I…Booth! Stop scratching your nose on my leg! Booth! That…that TICKLES!”

“Oh my God, you guys, just get a room!”

Through gritted teeth Brennan managed to choke out, “Not…helping…Angela.”

“Listen, Sweetie, how ’bout I ring you later when you’re finished…and if you have any sense you won’t be finished for QUITE some time…”

“Bye, Angela.”

Brennan hung up and pushed a hand into Booth’s face.

“That wasn’t funny.”

“Oh yes it was. And all without falling over too.”

“You should be disqualified.”

“I didn’t fall! You, on the other hand, were kicking me all over the place…”

Booth began to move a hand up the inside of Brennan’s leg. He managed to squish his fingers past the part where his head was snugly held in place and continued on up.

Brennan’s eyes rolled.

“Booth…you can’t…Booth!”

It all became too much and Brennan tumbled to the ground, nearly squishing her partner. Not that he minded. He joyously exclaimed into her chest, “I won!”

“You cheated!”

“You want a rematch?”

“You bet I do!”

Poor Angela is probably thinking that finally something happend.....she will be really disappointed when she finds out about the game of twister.....

of course I still read it kiki.....I don't care if I have to wait a little longer for new chapters as long as I get any chapters

Only B&B could argue like that about Twister. I liked playing it as a kid, but discovered as an adult that it's just not all that fun. The falls hurt more. lol

LOL. I loved it. Booth's comments were so funny.